Thankfulness

“— for I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength.”

Philippians 4:11-13 (NLT)

The month of November went by faster than any other month this year, at least for me. Unfortunately, I could not post before the month came to a close, but this a post dedicated to reflecting in thankfulness. I wanted to share how the Lord moved on my behalf this past month, as well as how I’m working to maintain an attitude of thankfulness regardless of challenges and setbacks.

Physics. For those who know me or have read my other testimonies regarding my academic journey, this class shifted my journey drastically. I was on the verge of failing and ended up withdrawing in the month of November last year. One year later, I am retaking the class (another version that is structured completely different) and I am excelling. I felt so confident in my performance that I took the leap of faith and started cultivating a relationship with my professor, who responded positively and is willing to write me recommendations for future applications. Physics is time consuming but its also pretty cool, something I wouldn’t have imagined myself saying as a junior who was once struggling at mastering the material. I am thankful that He gave me the strength to persevere and didn’t allow this to deter me from pursuing medical school.

Intergroup Dialogue Project (IDP). This is a dialogue based class I’m taking this semester which strategically places individuals from various backgrounds in a group to talk about a particular social identity such as race, gender, religion, socioeconomic status (SES), etc. The goal is to establish understanding across differences. I was placed in a group assigned to discuss SES, which is very interesting due to the fact that it’s a non visible identity that many don’t discuss. This dialogue challenged me to reach a new level of transparency as I shared very personal experiences regarding how SES shaped my upbringing and who I am today. I started to openly talk about things that I previously haven’t shared with my close friends. Reflecting on experiences I seldom discuss allowed me to confront emotions within myself that I didn’t know were present. After learning about SES more in a space where I could hear the perspectives of both high, middle, and low SES individuals, I have grown to become more empathetic towards those who have experiences unlike my own. Having a better understanding of who I am in this social identity has allowed me to strengthen my spiritual identity. My identity + experiences with socioeconomic status are not something I should be ashamed of, rather it is a testament to my endurance and God’s faithfulness in my life. I am thankful that this Christian walk, as Pastor Mike Todd stated (Planted and Underfunded), is about dependency and not sufficiency. God is calling me to something that is completely outside of my realm of provision, but I have faith that He is going to take me to places beyond what I can imagine.

Live in Truth (LIT). God lead me to start this bible study + prayer group this semester, and November was a huge challenge in terms of consistency. Anything you do in ministry should be coming from a place of overflow, meaning that I can only fill others from a place of being filled. There were times where I didn’t feel filled because I was drained from the obligations of being a student and didn’t spend as much time in His presence preparing as I desired. There would also be times where I did feel prepared and expectant, but people didn’t attend because they themselves felt overwhelmed. This was completely understandable, being that November is notoriously the most intense month for exams and assignments. But we as brothers and sisters in Christ had to be vulnerable about our struggles and encourage each other to make room for God. We have no being without God, and it’s important that we seek the face of the Lord regardless of the circumstance. In November, we’ve been discussing identity, and God has been revealing so many things to me that I am privileged enough to then go and teach to my brothers and sisters. It’s been blessing them in ways I didn’t expect and I am so thankful that we are able to grow together.

Post bacc. I recently decided to commit to pursuing post-bacc programs for my gap years before medical school, and its been a stressful process trying to find programs that meet my needs & that I meet the requirements for. On top of all this, these programs are very expensive and usually don’t provide much aid. However, I am so thankful that God has blessed me with people to connect with that can help guide and support me throughout this process. I got accepted into a Pre-Professional Programming organization this fall, which provides me with additional advisement and financial resources. I have been able to meet with my advisor almost every week this month to discuss my progress and get advice concerning the various programs I am looking into. I also have amazing resources like Jenifer who did a post-bacc prior to matriculating into medical school and can give me advice from her perspective as well as connect me to other people she knows who participated in post bacc programs.

Relationship. Today marks three months of being in a relationship with my best friend. One thing we’ve been seeking to grow in that was particularly difficult this month was practicing self care. It’s difficult to support each other when individually we may not feel at our best, but it’s important that we are continuously seeking the Lord for strength. Being pre-med, and him being an engineer, on top of both of us being very involved on campus (convinced we have superwoman + superman complexes) makes it difficult to find balance. But we are continuing to remind ourselves that God’s Love is what sustains, and making the appropriate sacrifices in order to support one another in the capacities that God allows. I’m thankful for the opportunity to love and be loved in a way that reflects Christ. I’m also thankful to pursue my purpose next to someone who is just as passionate about pursuing theirs.

With love,

Ebun.